Things do not seem to be getting much better in my life. In fact, they seem to be getting worse and that makes me scared.

Yesterday Kassi and I got into a HUGE fight because I told her I didn't want to cosign her loan. It wasn't a matter of trust that I based my decision on, it was simply because I don't want to have that kind of responsibility. Frankly, the only people I would ever ask to cosign on a loan would be my parents or MAYBE my grandparents.

So I told Kassi that I wouldn't cosign for it and when we hung up she acted like she would figure something else out and everything would be fine. However, after my second class was done there was a message from her crying and telling me that this is all my fault and I'm a liar and all this stuff.

I called Kassi and at first the conversation was semi rational. Then she started to flip out. She blamed me for her not having any money and said how could I not help her when I'm living at her mom's place for a week (which she OFFERED, by the way, I never once forced her into anything). She started screaming at me (meanwhile I'm AT SCHOOL and people are starting to look at me) about what a bitch I am and how she's going to put a lock on her door at the apartment and how she's going to throw my stuff out on the street. It hurt me SO BAD. I understand she's upset but the way she treated me isn't at all right and isn't at all fair.

Kassi hung up on me and I tried to call her back. I left her a message and by this time I was crying and practically hyperventilating. Then I called Dustin to tell him I was skipping my last two classes... in between tryng to catch my breath and stop crying. And in between THAT Kassi called me back. So I answered the phone, completely on my guard and actually SCARED. Kassi had at least calmed down and explained she was upset. I tried to explain myself and Kassi apologized... but I was still really hurt.

So I came to Dustin's and he calmed me down and we got food then came back to watch them tear apart his driveway. After he left I took a nap for a bit.

When I woke up there was a phone call from Kassi telling me I would have to take care of my own internet because she doesn't trust me to pay for it. Now I was just pissed, how dare she act like I'm the one who can't be trusted? So I went online and kind of bitched her out because I feel like she's pulling this crap just to hurt me even more. We finally came to an understanding but I'm not even sure how I'm going to feel comfortable around her. I've never felt so uncomfortable and on edge around one of my friends, even when we are fighting. She totally broke me down and lost my trust. I just don't know how this roommate thing is going to work anymore.

Meanwhile... things are good with Dustin and me. And last weekend Shannon, Carissa, Erica, Angie and I went bridesmaid dress shopping for Shan's wedding and found the PERFECT dress. My folks are buying me a new bed and next weekend is my birthday. But it's hard to feel happy when I feel like someone just threw me in front of a bus. *sigh*

Anyway. So there you have it. I guess I'm moving into yet another bad roommate situation.