The first thunderstorm of the year! I suppose I shouldn't be so excited about this because it's raining and I'm sure soon enough I'll be complaining about the rain. But right now I am so excited about it because I'm so hopeful that that really means that the SNOW IS GONE! WINTER IS OVER! I am SO joyful for that because I am super sick of winter. It's time for some warm weather.

I guess I want to say poor Dustin. I know I should just be laughing at him and saying "I told you so." And I DID say "I told you so" but I still feel semi bad. It sucks to have someone walk all over you. Then again, Dustin was the one that walked all over me but I guess I'm being the bigger person by not being a bitch about him coming to me. Basically he and Leah dated for about a day and then she decided she wasn't up for it. BIG surprise. Yesterday he IMed me when I got back from classes and was all, "Life sucks, I hate everyone..." and yadda yadda yadda. I tried asking him what was up, despite the fact that I already knew, and he wouldn't tell me so I suggested he come over and we go for a walk. So we walked and talked and he told me Leah screwed him over. I wasn't really sympathetic about it because... he doesn't deserve the sympathy. I don't think he was expecting it anyway. Hopefully our walk did some good although... I won't hold my breath.

A little bit later we were talking online and Dustin asked me if I would go into work for him for a few hours so he could go to a soccer coach's meeting. I need the hours because I keep getting cut early so I figured why not. It wasn't too bad and we were all being giggly so I guess it worked out okay.

The BEST part of yesterday was when I checked my schedule for next week and found out that I GET TO START SERVING *dances* I am SUPER excited for this although I'm a little bit nervous too. I'm one of those people that doesn't want to do something unless I can do it perfectly and I'm sure I'll do my share of screwing things up when I'm serving. Hopefully it will go well, though. Sam's training me in and she's awesome, plus I already know a lot anyway since I've been at Perkins for 9 months. So I'm sure it'll go pretty well.

After work Dustin came over and we ordered Steve's and watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I LOVE that movie. I'm not trying to start drama here by hanging out with him and this in no way means that I trust him again. Then again... I don't really hold anything against anyone anymore because I just don't care that much anymore. He can date Leah, he can not date Leah... I just don't really care anymore. I just want things at work to be cool and chill so that I can hang out with people and not have it be drama central. So hopefully things will finally be okay.

Anyway... speaking of work it's time for me to go get ready. So more soon!

I haven't written lately because... well... there hasn't been a lot to write. Since Thursday afternoon I've been sick with a cold. So on Friday, Saturday and Sunday all I did was go to work, come home, take cold medicine and go to bed. Seriously.

Spring break was okay. I didn't do a whole lot which was fine with me because I needed to take a mental break. So now it's game time. I have a little less than a month and a half to get my shit in order and make my GPA really shine. I'm more than a little stressed because I'm really procrastinating on some things. Then again, I usually do my best work when I wait till the last minute and work with a really short deadline. It's when I just give up and don't finish that I suck it up. It's not the healthiest way to go about school, especially when it comes to stress, but I'm so set in my ways and SO stubborn. One day I'll get over it. But that day is not today.

Things are calming down a lot in my world. Dustin talked to me and apologized to me. I told him he doesn't have my trust anymore, that he's done way too much for a simple apology to get that back. But I do have to work with him. And I don't want to miss out on hanging out with my other coworkers just because he's there. Life's too short to carry around hatred.

I don't have too much else to say. It was a beautiful day today. I promise more soon.

Ugh, so I'm sick. I really didn't think I was getting sick, I just figured something was up with my throat. Even when I woke up this morning I didn't feel all that sick, just a little out of it because I was sleeping on and off and didn't get to bed till probably... I have no idea, like 3 maybe? However, after my shower I just felt icky and now I'm coughing and sneezing and my head feels all stuffed with cotton. Ugh, I hate colds. Especially colds where I cough, I haven't had a coughing cold in a REALLY long time. Usually my nose and head are just stuffy. It must be the weather and hopefully it won't hang on too long, especially since I have a long weekend of work ahead of me, yuck!

Rich came over last night after I kind of yelled at him for... I don't know, not calling me or something? I know I need to calm down a few notches. I am having a hard time, though. It's difficult because I feel like I'm trying to get to know Rich the best I can but I'm not being given time to do that. It's like... when I had the time the first time around I took it for granted and acted like I didn't want to know about Rich. I don't even understand why I acted that way. I don't really feel like I even know that Krysten anymore. She's really hard to grasp onto. I don't remember why I didn't trust him, why I didn't want to know him, why I acted so selfish and immature. All I know is that this time I don't want to be that person. And part of me isn't anymore. When I am around Rich, and even when I'm not, I find myself wanting to hear him and about him. It's like he's a good book and I've only gotten past the first few chapters... and all I want to do is stay inside all day turning page after page, devouring every word. And I am slowly beginning to trust Rich. There are things that have happened between that make me... slightly wary of him. Then again, I can't say that I'm not partly at fault. But I realize he looks out for me, cares for me, wants good things for me. Now... I just have to stop taking everything so personal. It's hard not to. There's still a little piece of me that's broken. It's not just because of Rich. It's due to a lot of things that have happened over the last year. And I'm not looking for Rich to be the one to fix me. I need to do that on my own. But... I do want him around as I figure it out. Every day he's becoming more important to me. And I am so happy to have him in my life.

So... my ex-boyfriend Tom jumped back into my life again about a week ago. He was trying to apologize for acting like a dick. I'm just kind of tired of his whole drama. I don't get it. We dated... about two and a half years ago, right before I met Rich. And he was just an ass (Tom, that is, not Rich). He kept trying to pop himself back into my life and this past fall I did try to give him a chance. But it just was not happening and I wanted us to be friends until he pretty much proclaimed that I'm easy and had his friends prank call me. Anyway, so he instant messaged me the other day and said he wanted closure and wanted for me to not dislike him. And, frankly, he's just not a person that I'm ever going to like. Not the way he keeps acting. He's immature and rude and does not know how to handle people at all. And I don't like having someone beg for my forgiveness. That needs to be earned. I told him no and that he needs to leave me alone and drop it. I'm done trying to deal with these silly little boys.

I am SO looking forward to it being April. It's going to be such a busy, exciting month. Shannon is moving and I am SO excited for her because she really does need to get out of that bad neighborhood that she's living in. No more Mexicans hitting on me whenever I go over there. Then we have the "bridesmaids meeting" which is so silly that we're calling it that but it should be lot of fun nonetheless, especially getting to see Erica and Angie. I haven't seen Angie in AGES and I've heard she's done a lot of changing. It'll be fun. The next weekend is my cousin (well, 2nd or 3rd cousin, but who's counting) Robyn's wedding and I am SUPER excited for that, getting to see my grandparents and aunts who I'm not used to seeing so much. I just saw them in January for Grandpa's birthday. It's nice to get to be seeing them so much. And finally there's the Maroon 5 concert in which I will kidnap the entire band and lock them in my closet, hehe. In between all this I have to somehow manage to make A's and B's in all my classes AND try to convince Randy to let me start serving. Man oh man, it's going to be a hectic but awesome month!

Okay... I need to get some rest if I want to feel better. More soon!

I love how boys say that girls are manipulative bitches. I have met the most manipulative bitch... and hey, I went to Woodbury High School! And this bitch does not have a vagina (I would know). This manipulator is named Dustin and he is better at that game than any girl I have ever met. I won't even totally go into it. But basically today Lewann and I needed to talk because Dustin lied to me and got me mad at her, something I feel bad about because I really like Lewann. But we talked and realized that Dustin basically lied to me to get me pissed at Lewann so he'd look innocent. PLUS he lied to Leah and told her I was talking shit about her when I wasn't. So I talked to Lewann and to Leah and all is cool with us. And Dustin... well, I left a message telling him I knew what was going on. He was nice to me at work, as usual, but I don't believe a word that comes out of hit mouth. Bleh.

I'm so tired. Shannon came over tonight with Frankie, which was really funny. We went to Perkins so that Dustin and Benji could meet The Frank AND because Gabe was in one of my dresses, lol. That is a long story in itself but it was SO amusing. And, sadly, he almost looked better in it than me. Wow.

I will continue this tomorrow. When I'm sober. Goodnight!

Should it be hard to be friends with someone that is so into the guy that you used to be so into? I should think it would be more awkward than... well, than I guess I thought it would be. I assumed that Christina and I were cool. Dustin and I have a past, not one that I am particularly proud of. I slept with Dustin because... because he was new. Because he was sweet. Because I built him up to be this amazing, trustful, sweet person. I slept with him because it made Rich jealous. And I fell for Dustin a little. But he is turning into a person that I'm not even sure I want to be friends with. I slept with him because of so many things... that weren't true. So Christina can have him if he wants her. But Christina thinks I still want Dustin. It's kind of messed up. I guess I may look like I have something for him. I happen to like to hug people... or to jump on them or whatever. I'm just physically playful with my guy friends. To me it's never been a big deal. But Christina told me last night that it bugs her. It makes me feel bad because I didn't want to freak her out. But I'm over Dustin. He isn't the person I want. I finally figured that out.

It's funny the way the world works sometimes. It's funny how you realize how badly you acted to one person only to find out that that person deserved your very best. What if you just didn't trust someone because... because of nothing? The one person that really deserved it and you didn't give it to them just... because? So you pretty much screw up everything because you're too busy being self obsorbed as well as assuming that everyone is out to get you. Then... you're given this second chance. So do you take that second chance, make a fresh start? Or do you assume that it's not really a second chance, just some weird twist of Fate that will, as usual, end badly.

I've been trying to think more positively. And, for the most part, it's been working. But it's been a bad week and that's been wearing on me. Work was bad although today things got solved and I feel a lot better about that. There's all this shit going down with Leah. She's all pissed off because Christina and I were at Dustin's last night. Jealous much? I wasn't even planning on going, Amber was coming out here and we were just going to chill at my place. But then Christina told me I HAD to go and I haven't seen her for awhile so I figured why not. We sat around.... it was me, Amber, Dustin, Christina, Dustin's cousin Shawn, and Gabe. We drank, played ping pong.... Dustin's roommate's Bubba and Dave came home and that was fun. But the whole time Leah was texting me about what a bitch I am and texting Dustin all pissed that Christina and I were there. It's so stupid, the drama is so dumb. I'm going to figure out a way to block Leah's number from my phone because I just can't handle her stupid text messages anymore. I'm throwing all this drama away, it's so stupid.

I'm so sleepy. I think it's time for bed... for real. I start exercising tomorrow and I need to go grocery shopping. Tomorrow night is girls night. Yeah.

More soon.

Today, so far, seems to be turning out to be a much better day than yesterday. Not that too much went out yesterday but the few things that did go on weren't all completely fabulous.

My brain is settling into spring break mode REALLY fast. All day yesterday I couldn't remember what day it was, lol. I managed to start off the morning not so hot by being semi bitchy to Rich. I'm having a kind of hard time dealing with the fact that I'm not getting to see him a lot because of all this GM stuff. I miss him! I know it doesn't give me the right to be bitchy and I did apologize. I really hope that I'll get to see him soon. I'll be kinda bummed if we don't go to see the movie tomorrow, both because I really want to see Ring 2 and because I just miss Rich. So yeah. Fingers crossed.

Work was annoying. We were SO SLOW and Heath ended up being a total ass. Basically he told me around 7:30 that he was going to cut me soon. While it kinda sucks because I'd lose out on hours my brain automatically got excited at the thought of getting to go home early. However, it got to be about 8:30 and still he didn't let me leave. So I sat and chatted with Gabe for a bit. He was trying to get me to go out to the bars with him but I was pretty tired so I declined. Gets to be 9:00 and still I'm there. By this point Heath is doing all these stupid things to make him look busy to, I don't know, give some reason that I couldn't go home. I was PISSED. FINALLY at 9:30 he goes, "I guess you can go." You guess? Fuck off, Heath. Get a brain.

While I sat in my car waiting for it to warm up and melt the ice on the windshield I called Grandma and Grandpa. I talked to Grandpa for a bit and then got handed over to Grandma. I ended up sitting on the phone with her for about half an hour chatting like she was one of my girlfriends. I told her what was going on with Mom and Dad and that I'm pretty bummed about what they think of me. We also just talked about school and work and whatever. And a little about Rich. Basically Grandma told me that Dad had said he USED to not like Rich. So... does that really mean he likes him now? Hmm... that makes me a little less nervous about Rich coming to Robyn's wedding with me. We shall see, I suppose.

Today I woke up around 8:30... no idea why I keep waking up so early. I sat around, chatted with Amber online a bit. She's going to come out here tonight when I'm done working and we're going to hang out a bit. I finally finished getting around for the day around 11:30 and headed to the bank, Kohl's, and Barnes and Noble. Got some new khaki pants at Kohl's because the ones I always wear at work were getting pretty beat up. And a new book for Barnes and Noble. While I was there Christine called and I'm going to make an appointment at her school to get my hair deep conditioned so that it doesn't feel so dry. Yay!

So now here I am. I stopped at Taco Bell on my way back and got to eat yummy tacos! My Cosmo finally came in the mail so I'm excited to get to read it.

On Monday Lewann, Shannon, Christina, possibly Sam and I are going to have a girls night. Probably watch Sex and the City and drink girly drinks. And on Tuesday I have my appointment with Christine and then I'm going out to do some karaoke. Fun stuff!

That's about all for now. New entry in the PIXIE GETS HEALTHY section so feel free to check it out!

I just added something new, and pretty cool, to the learn section of my blog. It's called 43 things, which is basically a site in which you can put down 43 goals that you want to accomplish. Check it out, make your own, cheer me on with my goals! And, as usual, enjoy!

Okay, how rude. Today is my first day of spring break and my dad decides to call me at 8:30 in the morning. Granted I probably fell asleep around midnight but I could have slept until at least 10 before my internal alarm would have gone off.

I figured out something yesterday about classes. I have 19 more classes to take, which includes an internship which I will probably do next summer. My parents want me to take a full class load every semester. Which means I will be stuck in school 2 more years, 2 of those semesters in which I only take 4 classes instead of 5. So I don't even need to take a class this summer because there's no way around my being in school for 4 semesters.

I have yet to tell Mom and Dad that. I didn't even want to talk to them today but it had to do with my car and license plates and what not so I had to. Then Dad asked if I was coming to visit them at all over break. Why on earth would I do that??? So I can get bitched at AGAIN? I think not, I'm perfectly happy spending my break working, getting some school stuff done (even though Mom and Dad seem to think I don't do school work) and having a little fun.

Speaking of fun over break... because of this drama Dustin's being weird with Christina. She's kinda unhappy about it, rightfully so, so we're going to try to have a girls night. It's be Shannon, Lewann, Christina and me. I'm really excited to have a girls night and those three girls are awesome and quirky and totally cool so it should be lots of fun. Plus I've asked Rich if he wants to take a day trip down to Winona. I just really want to go somewhere and I haven't been back to Winona since I left freshmen year. Plus if we get there early enough I'm hoping we could go to LaCrosse and visit Amber since I haven't even seen her apartment. So maybe that's something Rich would like to do. We shall see.

Okay... so I'm a little bothered about something. I hate how people think my life is so much drama all the time and that I enjoy it being that way. Do I like this bickering and fighting and silly little bitches acting like they're cool? Nope... frankly I lose sleep over it and I don't enjoy fighting. If it were up to me I would go to school, go to work, chill with my friends and have everyone love each other. I didn't go around asking Leah to be a whore or a bitch and I didn't ask Dustin to be a pussy and a liar. But here's the thing. When someone that I think is a friend of mine lies to me I am not going to sit around and just let it happen. And I tried to talk to Dustin about it but as soon as I did he acted like I'm the one making shit up, which isn't true and I've got witnesses to back up that that isn't true. So then I get pissed. I'm sorry if I don't just sit there and let shit happen and let it not bother me. But I don't feel like having my name dragged through the mud and I don't feel like letting Leah think it's okay to bitch someone out for no reason. So to those of you that think I sit here and let this drama happen... or that I like it... that's bs.

Anyway.... yeah. Last night Shan and I got together to go wedding dress shopping. First we headed to TGI Fridays and Shan bought me a drink and appetizers (thanks Shan). That was pretty good, I've never had good service there but the bartenders were awesome so it was all good. Afterwards we headed to St. Paul and the dress shopping began. Three of the 5 (5?) that Shannon tried on were AWESOME but it's the 2nd one that just seemed totally perfect! I want it for myself, hehe. It was really fun to look at all those gorgeous dresses.... oh my gosh I love dresses! Eep! Finally we went to Caribou for coffee and to chat. It was really fun talking about her wedding but it makes me wonder about Amber's. She hasn't talked too much about it and when she does she seems so stressed, especially because Jono's dad seems to want to take it over. I feel bad for her, that totally sucks.

Okay I'm tired and hungry. Time for food and then maybe a little more sleep!

I am very, very tired of being a doormat. I'm very, very tired of being lied to and I am VERY, very tired of looking like a fool.

Last night Dustin came into Perkins because Bryan and I wanted to chill with him. Just before he came in, around 7:30, Heath said I was free to go. So Dustin comes in and I go out with them to stand around while Dustin and Bryan smoked cigars. I thought it was a little funny that Dustin asked Leah to come outside too... but then again, he asked pretty much the whole staff so I figured he was just being nice.

Then we're back inside sitting in 16 and rolling silverware. Dustin sits down next to Leah and I still thought it was a little weird how nice he was being to her. But I still just figured he was being Dustin. So I still didn't think anything of it. We all sat around drinking coffee and giggling and pissing off Heath... it was a good time.

I came back home and a little bit later I saw Dustin online so I asked him if he wanted to come over and watch a movie. We haven't really hung out since the hang out night two weeks ago and I just kinda wanted to make sure things were comfortable between us when it was just the two of us.

However, Dustin tells me he can't because he's going to hang out with Leah. Um... huh? Since when. Do you not remember the fact that Leah lied to both Christina and me? Do you not remember that she bitched both of us out, all because she wanted you all to herself? Do you not remember how the next day you went off about her... because I saved that conversation because I KNEW you'd go back to her! When he told me that I just lost it. The girl spends all her time lying and sleeping around and the worst part is that when Dustin's friends with her I can't trust him. Because anything I say to him in trust he turns around and tells her. Because he lies to me when he's friends with her. This past Thursday after I got home from Rich's Dustin and I were supposed to hang out. But he didn't call me. He finally gets online and I asked why he didn't call. I was a little pissed because I can't stand when people do stuff like that. He said that his phone wasn't working and that he was tired so he didn't want to hang out. I said that was cool, whatever. Then the next day at work Leah mentioned that Dustin was out at the bars. I thought that was kind of funny, both because Dustin had said he was tired and because Leah knew he'd been out. But I STILL chose to trust him. And now I realize that he outright lied right to me!

The truth has a funny little way of ALWAYS coming out. You lie and people WILL find out. And I am SO angry because once again I started to trust Dustin and once again he lied right to me. I'm sick of it. I want GOOD people in my life. I want to be a trusting person again. I'm really sick and really tired of continually having certain people in my life that take advantage of me..

Needless to say I pretty much bitched Dustin out. It was a pretty high school thing to do but I am so angry and hurt. I feel like a jerk pulling the whole, "If you're friends with her I can't be friends with you" line, especially because he's getting laid by her so I know it won't matter. But the fact of the matter is that when he is friends with her I do not trust him. And I do not want ANYONE in my life anymore that I do not trust.

So fuck you Dustin. I hope she's a really good lay and maybe this time she won't be fucking three other guys while she's fucking you. I hope you use some really good condoms. I wouldn't want any of the diseases she has to offer.

MEN.

Just added a few more pictures to Flickr. To check 'em out just head on over to my navigation bar on the right hand side of this page and click on photographs. Enjoy!

Yay! I have the internet back *dances* On Friday I awoke to NO INTERNET which, for those of you who know me AT ALL know what MAJOR trama. After being on the phone with Comcast for almost two hours I found out that the reason we had no internet is because we had an outstanding balance. Why? Because Tiffany failed to send us any of the bills from the beginning of 2005. Fantastic. We sent in our checks last week so I was told that we just need to wait until the checks were processed.

So today I found out that the checks went through on the 11st (very funny, FRIDAY). So I called Comcast again and for half an hour we tried EVERYTHING to get the internet to work. Finally the lady I was working with suggested that they send a technician out here. Bleh. I explained to Emalyn what was up. So she checked her comp and, like magic.... THE INTERNET WAS BACK! *dances* So joyfullness, I'm happy *smiles*

This past weekend was SO crazy and I am SO sore but it was fun. On Saturday night Shannon, Ryan, Amber and I went to 90's. Shannon and I were dancing machines, hehe, it was so much fun. I love 90's, I have to say. It has this certain kind of atmosphere that just makes me feel good. I didn't feel self conscious at all about letting loose and just being crazy. It was definitely a good time. On Sunday Shannon made this yummy breakfast for all of us (thanks Shan!) and then Amber, Shannon and I went rollerblading. It was crazy with all the little children trying to kill us. And I definitely am not as in shape as I used to be. But it was bunches of fun anyway.

Now I am SORE. I was really bad yesterday and happy that I didn't have to work. Today I feel better, my neck doesn't hurt anymore. My ribs are still a little sore and my leg still hurts a bit. But I'm sure by tomorrow I'll feel good again.

Yesterday I got a cute little sweater and matching shoes to go with the dress I'll be wearing to my cousin's (second cousin? third cousin? Well... she's some kind of cousin) wedding. I'm really excited for it, I love weddings. I'm really hoping Rich will definitely be coming with, I'm excited for my family to be able to meet him AND to have someone to dance with and whatnot at the reception. Eep, it's going to be fun!

Nada else going on around here. I cannot wait for next week and SPRING BREAK! I don't even have anything planned but it'll just be nice to not have to worry about classes for a week. So yeah. Time to get some stuff done. More soon!

I think I've got spring fever. I've never really had it this bad but I'm going NUTS right now. I'm daydreaming like crazy, I feel locked up ALL the time, all I want is to go outside without heavy close on and get warmed up by the sunshine. I'm praying that over spring break it will be semi warm out so I don't continue to feel like I'm in prison. Ah, I'm going CRAZY!

Life is pretty good right now despite the feeling of prison. Classes are going okay although I wish it was May and finals week was over. I've decided I'm not taking any summer classes so I'm looking forward to a summer in which I only have to work. It'll be nice to be able to relax my brain a little. Friends are good, too. Amber will be home on Friday for her spring break. On Saturday we're going to 90's and on Sunday we're going rollerblading. I'm excited, it will be great to see Amber again because it's been since... gosh, has it been since winter break? It sucks that I don't get to see her more but hopefully we'll make the most of it. Elisa and I have sent a few e-mails back and forth. We're trying to find a time to get together but we're both pretty busy with conflicting schedules right now. Hopefully we'll find time soon. As for Perkins, the drama seems to have calmed down. Dustin is sticking strong to staying away from Leah and the rest of us are all getting along and having fun. So that's great. Mom and Dad haven't called me nor have I called them. I'm pretty angry with them right now and don't have all that much to say to them. As for Rich... he's damn busy with this GM stuff and it sounds like he will be for the next few weeks. It really sucks because... I feel like I want this time to get to know him better. And because we suddenly are getting along so well that it makes me want to be around him more. I don't know what happened that caused the both of us to calm down but whatever it is... I like it. I like it a lot.

Actually... I've been thinking about Rich a lot lately. It's part of the reason I've been daydreaming so much. I am loving the time we've been spending together and every time I see him I find myself liking him more and more. Sometimes I feel like I've met a new person, which is both weird and exciting. It's as if... I have this new Rich but I also have the comfort and familiarity that I had with the old Rich. It's like... I no longer feel as if I want him to be something he's not. There were so many times before that I found myself thinking, "If only he could be a little more like this...." or "If only he could just change this little part of himself." It made me feel bad and I knew that wanting him to change was not good. However... I haven't found myself thinking that once since he came back into my life. I don't really know what that means or how that changed. But I love the happiness he brings me.

I wish my damn hair would grow.

I can't believe I'm going to cut this entry short because I had so much more to write. But I need to get some grocery shopping done. Soooooo more soon!

I just ate. And I like food. So... a food survey.

1. What's the last thing you ate? Spaghetti
2. What's your favourite cheese? Ugh, I don't really like cheese for the most part. Mozzarella?
3. What's your favourite fish? Nasty, I REALLY don't like fish
4. What's your favourite fruit? Raspberries, strawberries, blueberries... I like berries, hehe
5. When, if ever, did you start liking olives? I have loved black olives for FOREVER! YUMMY!
6. When, if ever, did you start liking beer? How funny... I started liking beer shortly after my 21st birthday. The only reason I started drinking it was because people started calling me a wuss
7. When, if ever, did you start liking shellfish? Ugh, nasty!
8. What was the best thing your mum/dad/guardian used to make? Hmm... I love my mom's beef stew or homemade chicken noodle soup. Or her spaghetti, so yummy
9. What's the native specialty of your hometown? We're supposed to have a native specialty?
10. What's your comfort food? Hmm... candy.
11. What's your favourite type of chocolate? White chocolate... mm, soooooo good!
12. How do you like your steak? I'm not a big steak fan but when I'm in the mood I like it medium well
13. How do you like your burger? Also medium well
14. How do you like your eggs? Away from me. I don't like eggs
15. How do you like your potatoes? Mashed with TONS of gravy and corn
16. How do you take your coffee? Black.... unless it's espresso in which case I like it with chocolate and strawberry syrup
17. How do you take your tea? Generally I just like it straight up. Sometimes I like a little honey though
18. What's your favourite mug? The one Amber gave me for my birthday two years ago. It's from World Market and it's purple with butterflies on it
19. What's your biscuit or cookie of choice? Mmm, definitely homemade peanut butter cookies
20. What's your ideal breakfast? Toast, hashbrowns and pancakes with strawberries, whipped cream and chocolate chips (just on the pancakes, DUH!)
21. What's your ideal sandwich? Lotsa salami on a buttery coissant
22. What's your ideal pizza? Steve's with pepperoni, sausage, and black olives
23. What's your ideal pie (sweet or savoury)? Definitely cherry
24. What's your ideal salad? Taco! I LOVE taco salads
25. What food do you always like to have in the fridge? Salsa for my chips
26. What food do you always like to have in the freezer? Ice cream.... preferably Ben and Jerry's Cherry Garcia
27. What food do you always like to have in the cupboard? Cereal and LOTS of it
28. What spices can you not live without? Um....?
29. What sauces can you not live without? Famous Dave's... any of their bbq sauces are to die for
30. Where do you buy most of your food? Econofoods, hehe
31. What piece of kitchen equipment could you not live without? Definitely a toaster
32. What meats have you eaten besides cow, pig and poultry? Um... none that I know of
33. What's the thing you ate that you picked in the wild? I'm sure I've eaten berries at some point
34. Arrange the following in order of preference (1 being your favorite): Italian, Mexican, Chinese, Indian, Thai, Sushi: Mexican, Italian, Chinese, Indian, Thai, Sushi
35. Arrange the following in order of preference: Vodka, Whiskey, Brandy, Rum: Vodka, Rum, Whiskey, Brandy
36. Arrange the following in order of preference: Garlic, Basil, Caramel, Lime, Mint, Ginger: Mint, Caramel, Lime, Basil, Ginger, Garlic
37. Arrange the following in order of preference: Pineapple, Orange, Apple, Strawberry, Cherry, Watermelon, Banana: Strawberry, Watermelon, Cherry, Banana, Apple, Orange
39. What's your fast food restaurant of choice, and what do you usually order? Definitely taco bell and I get a number 8, crispy shelled with a Pepsi
40. What's the next thing you'll eat? Something for breakfast tomorrow
41. What do you normally have for breakfast? Some kind of cereal and/or toast
42. What do you normally have for lunch? Soup or rice with gravy
43. What do you normally have for dinner? Really depends
44. What do you normally have for snacks? Chips and salsa or carrots and tomatoes
45. The 4 veggies you like most are: Tomatoes (unless they're a fruit, lol), cucumbers, carrots.... who knows what else
46. What fruit and vegetable do you like the least? Hmm... I like most fruits. As for veggies... I dunno, brussel sprouts
47. What’s your favourite chocolate bar? Frozen Snickers
48. What’s your favourite dessert? Fried ice cream or strawberry cheesecake
49. What’s your favourite drink? Lemonade
50. What’s your favourite snack? Chips and salsa
51. What’s your favourite gum flavour? Peppermit
52. What’s your favourite ice cream flavour? Ben and Jerry's Cherry Garcia
53. What’s your favourite potato chip flavour? Just plain is fine, hehe
54. What’s your favourite soup? Minestrone
55. What food do you hate? I hate a lot of foods, hehe. I'm quite picky
56. What’s your favourite restaurant? Famous Dave's, Don Pablo's, The Spaghetti Factory.... mm, I'm getting hungry!

Soooooo I'm sitting in my room right now drinking a Jack Daniel's Watermelon Spike and trying to calm myself after a really... topsy turvy weekend.

My parents basically dropped these huge bombs on me about my lack of money and about how I have to get my brakes fixed on my car and pay in for taxes and figure out how to pay rent this summer and all this stuff that I didn't plan for (well, I did plan for rent and I don't know how I was planning on paying for it but... add about $400 more to that and it becomes inpossible). Dad and I had this huge... thing on Saturday right in front of Shannon. It just makes me angry because Dad constantly thinks it's a good idea to bring up this kind of stuff in front of other people. I mean, I'm not exactly proud of the fact that I'm having all these money issues pop up and I didn't intend to bring Shannon with me for the weekend so she could sit and listen to that crap. And Dad thinks that the best solution for this is to pay for this shit and then move in with THEM for the summer so I don't have to worry about paying rent for the summer.

Shall I poke some holes in this plan? I lose my job if I leave for the summer. I lose my apartment if I leave for the summer. I don't get to have any of my friends AKA my REAL family around me. Sounds like a recipe for me being pretty damn unhappy this summer. Not to mention the fact that I can't be around my parents for more than a few days, let alone the entire summer. Frankly I think Dad's idea is a little fucked up.

I came home tonight feeling like shit. I've been trying really hard to figure out how to pay for this stuff and avoid having to move in with the folks for the summer. My original idea was to close my savings account, which I only have $300 in, and use that for my brakes. I can pay for the bills and taxes with my paycheck. And then ask Grandma and Grandpa for money for June's rent.

I called Rich just bawling. Maybe I do sound really spoiled not knowing how to deal with this stuff and not being prepared to deal with it. I know I managed to fuck up pretty good and I feel like a pretty big ass. So I called Rich who immediately told me to calm down and he'd help me with my car for A LOT cheaper than it'd be if I took it in somewhere. Ugh. He's wonderful, he really is. Big hugs to you, Rich.

I should rewind real quick to the rest of the weekend. Shannon and I did have a good time despite that. It was a LAZY weekend and it felt SUPER good. We watched some movies, bought some candy, went SNOWMOBILING (which is SUPER fun), and had yummy beef stew. Dad did do a few good things for me, fixed the lightbulbs so my turn signals work, washed my car... that kinda stuff. But he did it at the expense of continually bringing up my money problems. Thanks Dad.

In other "news" I am amazed at the amount of drama that goes on with the Perkins crew in one weekend. I stopped by on my way back from the folks' to pick up my paycheck and immediately Christina tells me that I need to come outside to hear what happened. Her story is that Rachel, a new server, was out at the bar with a bunch of them and hitting on Dustin and being really gross and all this shit and that D wasn't into it. Also, supposedly Loretta was being a bitch and trying to stand up for Leah until D had to put her in her place and explain that Leah bitched us out for no reason. So I talked to D online when I got home and he said that Rachel danced with him for about 2 seconds and Christina was all jealous, which he finds amusing. As for Loretta, she supposedly asked D calmy what was up, he explained, and she was cool with it. Oh it's just funny, Christina is so wrapped up in this and it's just funny. I'm glad D's back in my life and I'm glad Christina and I are cool. And I'll protect both of them if need be. But I'm going to take a step back now and let them decide what they want to do with their drama. I have my own life to worry about.

So.. I am tired and I have classes and work tomorrow. Time for bed so I'm wide awake for the start of my long week. Goodnight!

I don't really feel like writing tonight... so another survey instead....

TEN random things about me

1. I have to pee (lol)
2. My brother is 19
3. I could really go for a taco right now
4. I love cuddling
5. I wish I owned a coffee shop
6. My honeymoon WILL BE in Italy
7. I have the most awesome friends
8. I do not like pina coladas
9. I want to be loved
10. I wish it was 70 degrees outside

NINE places I've visited:

1. Siesta Key, Florida
2. Chicago, Illinois
3. Cancun, Mexico
4. Wisconsin Dells
5. Sarasota, Florida
6. Minneapolis, MN (well I DID!)
7. Springfield, Illinois
9. The closest point of the US to Cuba

EIGHT things I want to before I die

1. Get published
2. Be married
3. Travel
4. Have enough money to live comfortably but not extravagently
5. Learn to salsa
6. Swim with dolphins
7. Have children
8. Skinny dip (well I do!)

SEVEN ways to win my heart

1. Be real
2. Be honest
3. Be caring
4. Be affectionate
5. Be sweet
6. Be trustworthy
7. Be loving

SIX things I believe in

1. Love
2. Ghosts
3. Having fun
4. Living
5. That when things are bad they will get better
6. Being truthful and trustworthy

FIVE things I'm afraid of

1. Dying
2. Being hurt by someone I love
3. Closed in spaces
4. Heights
5. Physical pain

FOUR of my favorite items in my bedroom

1. Candles
2. My democrat donkies
3. My scarves
4. PICTURES!

THREE things I do everyday

1. Shower
2. Go online
3. Feel sleepy (hehe)

TWO things I am trying to not do right now

1. Wash my face (I'm just being lazy)
2. Go to bed

ONE person I want to see right now

1. No one.... *puppy eyes*

Oh money... I have been worrying about it A LOT lately. So... how fitting, a money survey! Enjoy!

Here is a list of items some people would consider "expensive." Please bold all the items that you spend money on regularly or occasionally.

-Hardcover books purchased new from a local bookstore. I'll buy a hardcover if I've been DYING to read the book and don't want to wait for it to be in paperback, such as Harry Potter or DaVinci Code

-Full service restaurant meals. Every now and then but I'm trying really hard not to

-Espresso or Cappuccino from a coffee shop. I do love Caribou and my mixed espresso drinks. But, again, I'm tyring to cut back and I don't get them as much as I used to

-Premium, clove, or imported cigarettes.

-Exotic produce

-High end make up/cosmetics.

-Premium gasoline

-Professional quality or luxury type shampoos, conditioners, etc.

-Salon services such as waxing, manicures or pedicures

-Health care

-Designer clothes, shoes, handbags.

-Not from concentrate Orange juice

-Massages

-Fresh Flowers

-The latest, top of the line computer equipment.

-Brand new car.

-Having your car professionally detailed

-Premium digital cable TV.

2. Of the things that you bolded above, are there any that you consider "necessities" rather than "indulgences?" If so, which ones and why? Nope.... all those things are definitely indulgences

3. Of the items listed in number one, which would you NEVER purchase, and why? Most of them... the cigarettes because I don't smoke, flowers because boys should buy those for me *wink*....

4. Name two or three of your favorite vices. How much money do you estimate you spent on them in the last six months? Definitely eating out rather than making my own food. I can't cook so it makes it hard to make my own food but I suppose I could learn. And I have a bad habit of going to Target and buying things I don't need.

5. How much do you pay for a bottle of shampoo? The last bottle I bought was under $4

6. When a new book by your favorite author comes out, do you run out to your nearest bookstore and buy it immediately no matter what the cost? If not, what do you do instead? Like I said, only Harry Potter is worth running out and buying right away. I don't really have a FAVORITE author

7. What is the most money you ever paid for a meal out? Describe the meal. Was it worth it? I really don't remember. I don't think I've actually been to a really fancy restaurant. I'm kinda cheap that way. I bet I've never paid more than $20 for a meal. And even $20 is pushing it

8. How many times per week do you eat out? Fast food or dine in? Too many... usually fast food because I don't like going to sit down restaurants alone, hehe

9. Is your primary vehicle considered a "gas guzzler?" Nope

10. What's the most you ever paid for a car? This is my first car and my folks only charged me $2500 for it. I still owe them $300, grr

11. Describe your favorite personal care or cosmetic indulgence and tell how much it cost. I am obsessed with dying my hair. However, I buy the really cheap $3 stuff, lol.

12. Do you ever shop as a recreational activity when you don't actually NEED anything at the moment? Yeah, I'm a big fan of therapy shopping, especially clothes

13. Are you willing to pay extra to buy at locally owned shops versus discount stores? Why or why not? I'm kind of a mass corporation kinda gal. God that's sad...

14. Is there any kind of health care that you are scrimping on right now because it is so costly that you can't justify the expense? Nope, still under the parents' insurance

15. Do you hire help to clean your home? How often and for how much money? I WISH! Dude, no cleaning? Oh wait, that's right, I'm not a spoiled girl, hehe

16. If you drink coffee, what kind do you drink and how much does it cost? Do you make it at home or do you buy it at the coffee shop? Is it McDonald's rotgut coffee? Have you ever belonged to Gevalia or a similar service? I love coffee. I'll make my own at home in the mornings when I'm really tired and need a boost. And, like I said, I love Caribou and will treat myself from time to time. But that's not an every day thing

17. Plain old toothbrush or high priced sonic toothbrush? Plain ol' toothbrush

18. What is your favorite non-necessity indulgence? How much does it cost? Why is it worth it? How often do you allow yourself this indulgence? Gosh... just shopping at the mall for clothes. I love clothes and feel like I need new clothes about once a month just to kind of treat myself. I know that material things shouldn't be a way of making you happy but shopping with the girls is always a good time...

Way too much has happened in the last 24 hours for me to write a real entry about it. So here's the short of it:

Leah is being found out as a master manipulator, liar, and a slut
Dustin apologized to me
I worked off the clock, in jeans and a t-shirt with a beer on it, while I was slightly intoxicated
Christina worked on the clock while intoxicated
I realized that I much more enjoy NOT being the center of drama
I sucked it up and asked Rich to my cousin's wedding without going back and forth about it for 10 years first
One of my regulars gave me a $5 winning lotto ticket *smile*
My boss got mad at me because he screwed up the register (go figure, it's Randy)
My best friend from when I was a kid e-mailed me
My psycho ex e-mail me pretending to be Rich (the e-mail will be at the bottom of this entry, complete with the fake e-mail addy for any of you that would like to send him an e-mail)
I turned in all my job applcations!

I'm EXHAUSTED so it's naptime before my Tuesday night starts. So here's the e-mail from John, the psycho ex. Enjoy!

Date:	Fri, 15 Oct 2004 07:58:59 -0700 (PDT)
From:	"Rich Green" Add to Address Book
Subject:	blast from the past
To:	princess_krysten_831@yahoo.com