Soooooo I'm sitting in my room right now drinking a Jack Daniel's Watermelon Spike and trying to calm myself after a really... topsy turvy weekend.

My parents basically dropped these huge bombs on me about my lack of money and about how I have to get my brakes fixed on my car and pay in for taxes and figure out how to pay rent this summer and all this stuff that I didn't plan for (well, I did plan for rent and I don't know how I was planning on paying for it but... add about $400 more to that and it becomes inpossible). Dad and I had this huge... thing on Saturday right in front of Shannon. It just makes me angry because Dad constantly thinks it's a good idea to bring up this kind of stuff in front of other people. I mean, I'm not exactly proud of the fact that I'm having all these money issues pop up and I didn't intend to bring Shannon with me for the weekend so she could sit and listen to that crap. And Dad thinks that the best solution for this is to pay for this shit and then move in with THEM for the summer so I don't have to worry about paying rent for the summer.

Shall I poke some holes in this plan? I lose my job if I leave for the summer. I lose my apartment if I leave for the summer. I don't get to have any of my friends AKA my REAL family around me. Sounds like a recipe for me being pretty damn unhappy this summer. Not to mention the fact that I can't be around my parents for more than a few days, let alone the entire summer. Frankly I think Dad's idea is a little fucked up.

I came home tonight feeling like shit. I've been trying really hard to figure out how to pay for this stuff and avoid having to move in with the folks for the summer. My original idea was to close my savings account, which I only have $300 in, and use that for my brakes. I can pay for the bills and taxes with my paycheck. And then ask Grandma and Grandpa for money for June's rent.

I called Rich just bawling. Maybe I do sound really spoiled not knowing how to deal with this stuff and not being prepared to deal with it. I know I managed to fuck up pretty good and I feel like a pretty big ass. So I called Rich who immediately told me to calm down and he'd help me with my car for A LOT cheaper than it'd be if I took it in somewhere. Ugh. He's wonderful, he really is. Big hugs to you, Rich.

I should rewind real quick to the rest of the weekend. Shannon and I did have a good time despite that. It was a LAZY weekend and it felt SUPER good. We watched some movies, bought some candy, went SNOWMOBILING (which is SUPER fun), and had yummy beef stew. Dad did do a few good things for me, fixed the lightbulbs so my turn signals work, washed my car... that kinda stuff. But he did it at the expense of continually bringing up my money problems. Thanks Dad.

In other "news" I am amazed at the amount of drama that goes on with the Perkins crew in one weekend. I stopped by on my way back from the folks' to pick up my paycheck and immediately Christina tells me that I need to come outside to hear what happened. Her story is that Rachel, a new server, was out at the bar with a bunch of them and hitting on Dustin and being really gross and all this shit and that D wasn't into it. Also, supposedly Loretta was being a bitch and trying to stand up for Leah until D had to put her in her place and explain that Leah bitched us out for no reason. So I talked to D online when I got home and he said that Rachel danced with him for about 2 seconds and Christina was all jealous, which he finds amusing. As for Loretta, she supposedly asked D calmy what was up, he explained, and she was cool with it. Oh it's just funny, Christina is so wrapped up in this and it's just funny. I'm glad D's back in my life and I'm glad Christina and I are cool. And I'll protect both of them if need be. But I'm going to take a step back now and let them decide what they want to do with their drama. I have my own life to worry about.

So.. I am tired and I have classes and work tomorrow. Time for bed so I'm wide awake for the start of my long week. Goodnight!