Does anyone else find it funny that my English lit prof walked into class today with some Mardi Gras beads and suggested that if we wanted any we could stop by his office. He didn't mean it the way it sounded, hehe, but it was pretty amusing nonetheless. Right now we're discussing The Jungle by Upton Sinclair and we were going over how small town people have a hard time moving to a bigger town or city. I have to say, those of us from bigger towns that move to smaller towns could have just as hard a time. It's like moving into a different culture. I came here from Woodbury where I pretty much felt like an unknown and I liked it that way. I was used to my life with my close friends being the only people that knew my business. I was shy girl at classes, workaholic at work, and crazy YIG girl for 4 days out of the year. Then I move to this town... where I'm still the shy girl at classes. But I'm the supposed spaz at work and everyone in this town knows who I am, who I've slept with, what I ate for lunch yesterday... and even things that aren't even true. And you wonder why I can't wait for this drama to be over with. I wanted to fit in at first. But who really has time to go to the bar at least 4 times a week? Who has the money? Who cares? I go to work and I listen to them talk about how trashed they were the night before, who snuck into the bar underage, who fucked who and who puked all over the bathroom. Wow, sounds like a winning crowd. I probably sound like sour grapes. That or I sound like I'm badmouthing behind their backs. I'm just trying to figure out what I first found so appealing about these people, all succumbing to each other's peer pressure.

I have this small group of friends that I am incredibly comfortable with. We can be honest with each other and don't have to worry so much about doing EVERYTHING perfectly, or the way anyone else wants it. None of us is exactly alike and we don't pressure each other to be that way. And isn't it more fun that way anyway? Which do I prefer? The people who like me to my face and talk about me behind my back? Or the people that like me to my face... and like me behind my back too?

Yeah... that's what I thought.

My boss is being one sneaky sonofabitch. Yesterday I went to check my schedule for next week and in addition to my usual 4 shift week I had an extra shift, Tuesday from 5 to 8. This ticks me off for a few reasons. Reason one is that my availability says that I can't work on Tuesdays or Thursday. I have classes for 5 hours on those days and when I come home I'm exhausted. The idea of having to go to work just doesn't fit with me. Second, my availability says that I only want to work 4 shifts a week. This shift would be shift number 5 for next week. Now... I'm sure it sounds like I'm just complaining and I should suck it up after all the complaining I did about my lack of hours over winter break. But school is wearing me down already. I need some time to myself and some time to do schoolwork. Anyway, so this morning I called Randy to tell him that he'd made a mistake in scheduling. He gave me this guilt trip about sucking it up and how he'll have to hire someone else and screw over our hours. Like I'm the only one pulling the "I can't work on certain days" stuff. I don't want to bend down and say, "Okay just this one time" because I know Randy and I know he'll try to push me around. So then I text Dustin and HE goes off on me because now HE'LL have to work alone. Sheesh. I just cannot win. I've pretty much come to the decision that I'm going to stick with Perkins till I figure out an internship that pays and then I'll just tell Randy to screw off. So... for now I'm kinda stuck. Eh. Worse things in life.

I'm gonna be a MODEL. Hehe. I'm so excited about Doug coming here next Saturday. I talked to Christine about doing my hair and she says that's cool, so I'm psyched about that. Doug and I were kinda talking about what kind of shoot I wanted, what I want to wear and whatever. I want some hot stuff... low cut shirts and skirts with fishnets. And some classy stuff, probably my pink gauzy dress. And... some undies, hehe. I can't help it, I love walking around in a tank top and panties, it's what I feel comfy in so I want a few pics of it. Eep, I'm excited!

Not too much else to say about today. I'm sleepy and the next few days will be fun, what with drinks or something with Sir Richard tomorrow and then foodage with Shan... and I guess Dustin has to come along. Maybe Shannon can talk to him about why he's such a spaz. So yeah. My knee hurts from falling yesterday, there's a big bruise on it. It's kinda cool, like a battle scar. Maybe I should just start falling down and getting bruises.

Or not.

Okay... obviously I'm crazy. More soon!