Today I give myself persmission to: edit what no longer works...
Editing what no longer works can mean so many different things to so many different people. I also think that depending on what you edit depends on how long that editing process can take.
I decided to take today's permission literally rather than taking it to mean editing things in my life. And so I edited my room, hehe. I went through all of my clothes because I keep some clothes simply due to the fact that they USED to look cute or I USED to like that color or I spent a lot of money on them a long time ago and it would be a shame to give them away. Not a good reason to keep clothing. So I went through everything and will be giving to the Good Will anything that I have not worn in awhile that I keep saying I will and never do. Along with that I am getting rid of three bras that I just cannot stand but keep around for one reason or another.
I also went through my panties. Lol, don't worry, those aren't going to the Good Will. But I tossed out anything that makes me feel uncomfortable, that I don't wear, or that I bought to "seduce" Rich. I want to own underwear that
I like, not what someone else will like because I'm the one that has to wear it and certain kinda of panties can be SO uncomfortable!
I love the new perspective I am getting in my life. In these past few days I have felt a lot happier than I have in a long time. Not talking to Rich has made me appreciate the people in my life that treat me so well and has also caused me to feel a lot lighter, less stressed. I didn't realize that the person I thought I loved so much was causing me to feel hatred and anger... was causing me so much sadness. This past week has felt so good to me and I want to continue on the path to feeling this good.
I need to admit something totally silly. The other night I had a make out dream. That may not seem silly except that it has been FOREVER since I've had a "make out only dream." Usually if I have dreams about someone of the opposite sex it involves A LOT more that just making out And yeah.... it involved Dustin. Woah man, I have not been so into kissing someone in quite a long time. I just feel so silly, that dream was so NICE. D brings out the younger side of me and I think I've really missed that side of me. I've been spending too much time convincing myself that I need to grow up, that I need to be an adult 24/7, that I cannot be silly or giggly or ME! Oh I could DANCE!
My day hasn't really even started yet and it's 2:30. I have my second final in an hour, marketing, and I've actually studied for it but I'm still scared. Afterwards, at 6, I have to run over to my landlords' house to drop of my security deposit and I'm hoping that won't take too long. Tonight Ali and I are running over to the football house because it's Teddy's birthday. I don't really want to be there too long, I'm not all too much in the party mood tonight. And to round the night off heading over to D's for who knows what.
So.... I will enjoy my last hour till Hell 2 falls upon me, hehe. Joyful finals.
MORE SOON!
